Our Team

Paranoid Pangolins was created by OWAA, (Our Wives Are Asleep LLC)*. Initially a poorly ranked DOTA 2 guild, OWAA evolved into an elaborate crypto based tax evasion scheme. There's no telling where we'll go next.

But we couldn't have done it alone! We could not have collected so much unfiltered truth without help from the following advisers:

Arthur Manstein

Arthur graduated from Yale university with a Masters Degree in Economics. Before moving into cryptocurrency he worked for household names like WeWork, Dow Chemical, Halliburton, Theranos and Blackwater.

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Rev. Dr. Nikita Brown D.D.S. Mdiv. N.P (picture is of an older African American woman in a lab coat)

Dr. Brown was raised in the Aquarian church but converted to Yaruba after attending a nude transcendental meditation session with Yogi Davïid Asslehaugh. Since then she’s dedicated her life to combining the science of modern medicine with the wonders of Kaballah inspired healing arts. Unfortunately her contributions to our project are limited by an ongoing legal battle with the FDA. Big Pharma’s lap dogs in the government *Falsely* accused her of putting lead in her detoxifying tampon product line. She currently resides in Barbados, but interested parties can join energies with her by meditating on Tuesdays and Thursdays between 2-4pm gmt

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Elizabeth "Liz" Ard-Parson

A self described “Ethical Hacker”, Liz is the genius behind this project. Aggregating anti-authoritarian free thinkers in one place was her idea, as was having them purchase products on an immutable ledger alongside their personal information and transaction history. When she’s not coming up with the next big thing she’s sunning herself on a beach near Silicon Valley California.

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Lt. Com. Arvin Killingstein ret.

Arvin served in the US navy for over 15 years. His career brought him through the Bermuda Triangle over a dozen times. After reporting a UFO he was accused of stealing oxycontin from the med bay and dishonorably discharged. Fortunately, his career at sea continued in the Sea Org where he rose to the rank of Laser Colonel. Arvin brings first person knowledge of what we’re up against. He’s seen “them”, fought “them” and lived to talk about it.

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Albert Sweeney “Big Al”

You probably know him from his run at the Libertarian party nomination in 2012. Accruing over $10k in donations and dozens of votes, Albert shifted the conversation on liberty from simple discussions about taxation to bigger more relevant issues like frog homosexuality and the over diagnosis of alcoholism. When he’s not selling Paranoid Pangolins, you can hear “Big Al” each night on his radio show “Look Behind You” in the mountain west region. Tune in to AM 1570 “the Hawk” from 1-3am for the unfiltered truth.

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“Carl”

Carl is listed here against his own objections. Nevertheless we felt it was impossible to discuss this project without mentioning the man who contributed well over half our funds. Carl is not afraid to do what’s necessary to find the truth. He is constantly encouraging us to move unregistered firearms across state lines, buy mining explosives from his friend, download strange files, or trespass federal buildings. Maybe one day we’ll be as dedicated to the cause as Carl is.

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*Like most NFT founders, we are going to remain anonymous. Fortunately, you can trust us! What's a little money between friends?